The Wondering Mind blog

Meta description: Discover how cognitive dissonance influences behaviour, and how psychotherapy can help us navigate conflicting beliefs and emotional tension.

Intro
Ever felt like two parts of you were pulling in opposite directions? Maybe your values say “save money” but your fingers tap “buy now” with convincing speed. That mental squirm is cognitive dissonance—a psychological phenomenon that deserves more than a passing thought.

What Is Cognitive Dissonance?
First coined by psychologist Leon Festinger in 1957, cognitive dissonance refers to the emotional discomfort we feel when our actions, beliefs, or values don’t align. It’s that gap between “who I am” and “what I do”—and how we try to bridge it.

Real-World Example
Imagine someone who champions health and wellness, yet smokes regularly. That inner tension (“This is bad for me” vs. “I still want to do it”) triggers dissonance. To cope, they might rationalize the habit (“It helps me unwind”) or minimize the danger (“My granddad smoked and lived to 90”). These mental gymnastics help restore a sense of personal coherence—but not always in healthy ways.

Where Does Dissonance Come From?
Cognitive dissonance doesn’t just appear—it’s shaped by life experience. From early childhood, we develop “creative adjustments” to make sense of the world. If someone grows up in an environment where expressing anger is taboo, they may suppress emotion even as it simmers inside. These patterns stick and often resurface when we face conflicting values or tough decisions as adults.

Working with Dissonance in Therapy
In psychotherapy, dissonance isn’t something to fix—it’s something to explore. Narrative therapy helps clients unpack the stories they live by. Someone might label themselves a “failure,” yet their actions show resilience and growth. Therapy gently disrupts these labels and invites fuller, truer narratives.

Gestalt therapy takes a more experiential approach. By dialoguing between different parts of the self (like “the responsible one” vs. “the free spirit”), clients can externalize inner conflict. These techniques don’t demand answers—they create space for curiosity and self-integration.

Why It Matters for Personal Growth
Cognitive dissonance is a signal, not a flaw. It tells us something inside is being re-evaluated—an identity, a value, a relationship. When approached with openness, dissonance becomes a catalyst for transformation, not a roadblock. For those in personal development, coaching, or therapy, it’s a rich territory to explore.

Final Thoughts
In a world pushing us to be consistent and certain, cognitive dissonance reminds us that being human means holding contradictions. Therapy doesn’t erase these tensions—it teaches us how to live with them, and even grow because of them.